Monday, June 18, 2012

Dilettante

That is what I am this summer. I even bought a really expensive mango, harking back to those summer vacations of yore where all my clothes had yellow spots and my face had a mandatory mango heat boil. This limbo between schools means that I have a summer off. School's out. I sometimes say those words to myself on icky hot days where my biggest concerns are which book to pick. I think those two words strung together is the nicest sentence in the language.

After two years of crushing worries in grad school, I spent the first half of this unexpected vacation worrying myself to death about wasted time and a lack of purpose. Maybe I should be working towards a summer project or travelling or well, something. But I'm temporarily sick of work. And the only way I can travel is if someone hires me as pack mule, since being between schools is also a euphemism for unemployment.

Relaxing is hard at this level. Everyone here is a highly motivated graduate student, wishing for more hours in the day to fill with work. Heck, I wasted a whole month just judging myself. If I'm not working shouldn't I focus on fun? Plan trips, invade theme parks, drive forever?

A massive finger to all of that. What I'm doing is various shades of presently enjoying nothing. Working out some transport phenomena problems because I want to, painting, overloading my Kindle so that it crashes and making khana everyday. It's a slow, dreamy life. With tea in the evening, a pool to lounge in and girlfriends who revere Bollywood pulp. I'm happy, anyone would be with this pool :) 


P:S
Sharan, my mother, on Skype this week, asked how you are doing and sends her regards. She is a rather random woman too :)





5 comments:

Dharini said...

Mangoes in the US are flavorless :( I pine for the sheer awesomeness of mangoes in India..If only my parents could have smuggled some..

Sharan said...

WHAT WHAT WHAT OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! I'm ok, I miss Bombay and the rains and am thoroughly tired of Delhi at the mo. I want to meet Mrs. Mendonca!!

Unknown said...

@Dee: We had Haitian mangoes from the farmer's market. Surprisingly good :) mom's wondering about FedEx'ing mangoes :D

@Sharan: She'll be happy to know that :) Leave Delhi, come here!!! Please.

Such! said...

I feel lost. I miss home. Or rather I miss the people who made it home (?). but most of them are here. So what do I miss?

spindazzle said...

I like keeping in touch with you this way. And the picture of Gateway at Gainesville made me sad :( .Keep writing, I'd like to know what you're upto :)